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Well, all hard cover winners and purchasers books went out this morning! That’s the good news. So sayeth the US Post Office…all books should arrive at their destinations on or around November 21st.

I was going to wait to send them out until the paperbacks showed up, they shipped yesterday. But, I need to get out of the house at least for a little bit. This left me with a dilemma. Which leads me to….

The bad news…I had to go to the Post Office. I’m betting three things that almost never show up in a US Postal Worker’s random drug test are; speed, cocaine, and crack…all of which might help make them more efficient in the right doses.😉

When I HAD a job, I would go to the Post Office after work to send out books. I got out at 1pm so (stupid me) I figured the reason there was only ONE window open EVERY time I went was; lunch.

Nope, that’s not it.

I was there at 9am and….one window and one window only please.

WTF? Why do they even have SIX windows if only one is going to be open at any given point in time?

There was only one person ahead of me, I stepped in line behind him. We waited at least ten minutes while some moron figured out how to fill out the money order slip. The guy ahead of me got his turn, he was there and out in like 3 minutes. I went to take my turn and two…ah….women, one in a brown velour jogging suit….stepped ahead of me. I wanted to complain but I saw then filling out some form or other when I came in. This isn’t the DMV where ‘jumping ahead’ when one has already been to the window is understandable and very well-tolerated. I figured if the Postal Worked behind the counter didn’t say anything to them then I wouldn’t either even though it ticked me off.

Neither woman spoke English. (We’ll leave that there.)

I have no idea what form they were trying to fill out but I waited fifteen minutes for them to get their asses in gear and finish doing whatever they were trying to do.

I got up to the window and, well from standing in line I knew I was going to be greeted by my ‘favorite’ Postal Worker. Chick’s a bitch, she really is. I put my bag on the desk and as I took out the packages I said: “I want to send these all Book Rate. There’s nothing in the envelopes but the books.” I said it clear, nicely, and distinctly. What did she say to me?

“Is there anything else in these envelopes? Any written material or anything?”

Oh crap! Are you deaf, lady? “No, just the books.” Bitch. She does that to me every time. She makes me feel like I’m in Court swearing an oath or something, it’s ridiculous Now, yes, I know they have to ask…I get that…BUT….that’s why I ANSWER beforehand. Just, ya know, get it outta the way.

She asked me…for each book.

WTH?

Ok, fine.

Then she couldn’t read the zip code on one package. I admit my handwriting is not the best in the world. But, dig this, there are only 10 numbers. That’s it. 10. So….any person of reasonable intelligence should be able to figure out any sequence of numbers no matter how poorly they’re written. I looked at the package and the zip code contained only 3 of those 10 numbers. To me at least, it clearly read; 08108. It read so clearly that I wanted to turn to the woman behind me and say: “Can you read this?” but I just smiled and rattled it off to her.

Then I got a little lecture on the importance of making the zip code…if nothing else..legible on the packages I send out.

How nice. Like I have never in my life heard; Lisa, you got some shitty handwriting!

Yes, I know. The harder I try to make it neat the worse it becomes. Been that way since grammar school. I don’t know why. It just is so everybody else out there…suck it up like I have to.

Next package went fine.

Third package: “What this zip code?”

Really? Ok. I looked at it and read it, again it appeared just fine to my old eyes: 73115

“The computer says that’s Oklahoma City, whatyagothere?”

“Del City.”

“Well?”

Well…. “That’s what the person gave me, send it. If it comes back it comes back and I’ll deal with it.” (If I can, I don’t even have this person’s email address, they’re the winner through Paranormal Romance. If it comes back I’ll get in touch with them, they’ll get in touch with her, she’ll get in touch with me….oh bother. BUT…when I came home and checked it, yes, that was what the winner gave me. What else was I supposed to do?)

Last package.

“This is heavy. Are you sure this just books?”

Ah…duh. Couldn’t she tell by feeling it that there were TWO books in that package? One on top of the other.

C’mon, lady, you can’t be that dumb!

“Yes, two books.”

Big sigh and roll of the eyes, “Well…all right.”

I walked out with an empty canvas bag, a receipt, and pride for not reaching across the counter and slapping her.

I get to see her bright shining happy face again when it’s time to send out that round of paperbacks. Oh joy.

Perhaps I’ll start taking the drive to the Post Office in Waterford instead.

About lbdarling

Beware...the truth is spoken here. If you can't handle that...buh-bye.

Posted on 15/11/2011, in Life, new london and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Lisa, let me start by saying that I do not work for Stamps.com & am not being paid to hawk their product, but if you have to do mailings of any volumn at all, their service is well worth it. For a monthly fee of $17.99, you can print all the postage you want at home. If the envelope can be run through your printer, you can print the postage & address with barcode right on the envelope. For large envelopes or boxes, you can print the address & postage on standard size Avery labels which are available at office supply stores. The software uses the post office database to verify the address is correctly formatted & adds the +4 to the zip code.

    We have a large mailbox & can pile a lot of packages in it for pick-up by our mail carrier. If we have a package too large to fit in the box, I put the flag up & leave a note to come to the house to collect the outgoing mail. The only time I have to go to the post office is if I missed our pick-up & have a package that has to go out that day or if I want to send something certified.

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