Sticker Shock

I suffer terribly from sticker shock. I really do. It’s an awful affliction. I often believe that even if I were a multi-millionaire there are several things I would not pay the ‘asking price’ for.

Last night I told hubby we were going out clothes shopping today. He needed new jeans/pants and shoes and I needed new jeans and underwear. I managed to save a nice chunk out of the family budget for this and, as I said, we REALLY NEEDED these items. The last time we went clothes shopping was probably 2 years ago. This isn’t necessarily something I was looking forward to. I’m getting older and, as it so happens with women at my advanced age, I’m putting on a little weight. The last time we did this I ended up getting 3 pairs of size 8 jeans and I haven’t been able to wear 2 of them because they cut me off so badly.

For two years I have walked around very depressed believing I am sadly overweight. So, no, clothes shopping wasn’t on my list of Things To Do.

I wanted to go to Burlington Coat Factory but hubby talked me into going to the Salvation Army first. I had some money, I didn’t really want to go to Sally’s Alley but….ok. The last time we went there I ended up with 1 of those pairs of jeans that didn’t fit right and they didn’t have much selection. This time was different. They had a very wide selection. While hubby went to the Men’s Section and grabbed jeans off the rack I did the same in the Women’s Section. We got to the Fitting Room at the same time. He had 3 pairs of pants all in his size and he knew they were his size because men’s pants are actually sold by waist and length. They do not adhere to the made up standards of women’s clothing manufacturers. He tried his on, got right in and right out.

I tried mine on, everything from a size 8 to a 16! I couldn’t believe the jeans in my hands were a 16 to begin with and when they wouldn’t go past my thigh I wanted to cry. My mother was an 18 I can’t possibly be two sizes below her and still fit comfortably in my one nice paid of size 4 jeans….right? I tried on a size 13 and they fit fairly well a little loose but ok. I tried on a size 10 dress pants and they fit very well, they went into the “I’ll Take It” pile. After going through so many sizes I started to bitch, maybe a little loudly, about how I wish I could walk into a store and grab a pair of jeans labeled clearly by waist and length! I went back to the rack and picked through again. I found 4 pairs of size 6 jeans that I loved and wanted and was ready to go home and eat an entire thing of Ben and Jerry’s when they wouldn’t fit. I got to the fitting room, they slide on like butter. ALL four pairs!

Oh Happy Day!

I looked at the labels; Calvin Klein, The Gap, INC(?) and American Eagle Outfitters. All size 6. All fit like a glove. Not too tight. Not too loose. No dreaded Camel Toe and my new hips and ass looked kinda good. Sorta….womanly and not, well, ya know. Not to mention the fact they’re actually made of denim and not this cheap flimsy material that passes as denim lately. And, BTW, ALL are hip hugger bell-bottoms….oh wait, for you younger folks they’re low rise flares.πŸ™‚ Which, will forever be my absolute favorite style of blue jeans.

So I got 3 pairs of jeans and 1 pair of dress pants. Hubby got 2 pairs of jeans and 2 pair of dress pants. Since it is Sally’s Alley, which is the ONLY store where I NEVER look at the price, if I want something and it fits it just goes home with me, we also got some tops. Probably about 10. I got some tanks and spaghetti strap tops, I like them for summer and I sleep in them. Also a few dressier tops. Hubby got a few shirts too. We walked out of there with two big bags of clothes for $81.00.

That’s my idea of shopping!

Then it was time to get underwear. We decided on Kohl’s. Hubby needed new shoes so he went off to the shoe department while I went to the undergarments thinking I would get a few pretty bras and pairs of panties. I mean, I am older, my risk of ‘staining’ a nice pair of panties is nearly over so I was looking forward to it, especially after realizing that, while I may be a little bigger, I am not grotesquely fat after all. Then I got to the lingerie department and nearly fell over from sticker shock. The department is HUGE too! I got lost! I wandered around looking at all of the fairly ugly bras and nice panties wondering when they got so damn expensive. The average price of a single pair of panties was $10.00! The average price for a bra $32.00! I wandered and wandered and finally found Hanes 3 pairs for $10.00, that I can live with. I got two. Then I got stuck again because there were no bras to go with them. Wander some more. I’m standing there staring at every color/style/size bra and panty in the known universe knowing I NEED these things but so unwilling to PAY the price. When I say I NEED them…trust me, I do. ALL of my panties are ratty–they have holes, stains, rips, tears and have been worn out. Several have also been ‘requisitioned’ by my daughters. The two decent bras I own cut into me so badly I won’t wear them anymore. Still, I couldn’t justify it to myself.

Just about the time I was ready to give up I heard a voice in my head say;

Just pay the price

And as if by magick a second later behind me I actually heard; “Would you just pay the price?”

I have no idea how long hubby watched me wander but he was looking at me with that; Oh, I love you, honey, even if you are a bit dopey look on his face.

I said I would go without a bra before I paid $32.00 for one. Hey, at my size, I really don’t need one. Ok? Besides, almost all of them were False Advertisers. They were padded so much even I wouldn’t try to pull that off. Even the “junior” bras (which would have fit me) were padded up the ass. Don’t get me wrong, I like a good padded bra under a sweater or nice dress but not as a steady diet. At the end of the day, when a small-breasted woman like me takes one off one of those suckers….my breasts hurt! They’re SORE from being squished unnaturally like that all day long. So I’d like to have, ya know, just a couple of nice comfortable bras that maybe went with the panties I picked up. After wandering around and around again I settled on 3 bras at about $15.00 each…on SALE! Then hubby made me get another set of undies, Jockey brand….3 pairs $18.00! I said ‘no’ but he said ‘yes’.

We went to the check out. 9 pairs of panties, 3 bras, 1 pair of shoes; $141.00!!!!

Holy shit!

Good thing I only do THAT once every 2 years or so. I think, in 2014, I’ll just consider going commando full-time.πŸ˜‰

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About lbdarling

Beware...the truth is spoken here. If you can't handle that...buh-bye.

Posted on 14/04/2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. Lol! I totally understand how you feel. I am really big on sales. I will wait until my clothes are on their last legs before I buy new for myself. My hubby is always telling me to buy new ones. He, however, does not have an issue buying clothes for himself.πŸ™‚
    Thanks for sharing. I am glad to hear that I not alone in this battle.

  2. is why naked is good.

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