Even though I was frustrated with all of the death and blood and guts in the story yesterday (it’s gonna get a little worse yet!) I did manage to steel my nerves and put my fingers on the keyboard.
That’s always a good thing.
It’s even better when my fingers actually move across the keyboard!🙂
I went back to the 3-in-1 death scene and spruced it up a little, got more work to do on it but it’s shaping up a little better. I have to tear up over it…so that’s how I know it isn’t right yet. But we’re getting there. We added in several touches in the afternoon including a line; “Their bodies bathed in a layer of sweat so thick it was like oil it poured out every pore until it soaked the blankets and the mattresses letting the undeniable scent of Death leech into the room.” I liked it.
We went forward.
Hubby went out to play last night and, for the first time in a long time, I did what I always threaten to do on Wednesday nights. I actually SAT HERE and WROTE. We continued working on the scene and decided to go back and see if we’d added in a touch earlier on that would tie in here. We did. I scanned forward to just after that part and my eyes fell on: “Bathed in a sweat so thick it was almost oil, the foul odor reminded Alena of old gym socks buried deep at the bottom of a locker for a month or more along with the crusted remains of a tuna fish sandwich.”
I wrote it twice. I hate it when that happens. Then I was stuck between them two of them and their exact placement within the chapter. Decided that the original was popping up too early and the latter was in a good spot. Then it was; So, wanna combine ’em? Switch ’em? Ditch one?
That took about a half hour! grrrr I finally merged them but I don’t really like it; “It went on for hours, the screaming, the babbling, and the biting. Each time Alena thought that it couldn’t get any worse; it did. Their bodies bathed in a layer of sweat so thick it was like oil it poured out every pore until it soaked the blankets and the mattresses letting the undeniable scent of Death leech into the room. The foul odor reminded Alena of old gym socks buried deep at the bottom of a locker for a month or more along with the crusted remains of a tuna sandwich. ”
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’ll ditch the last sentence. But I do like the mental scent it conjures up…hahaha. EWWWWWW. BUT ‘the undeniable scent of Death leaching into the room’ is a bit more poetic and literary. Still, I like the gym socks and tuna sandwich. Maybe I’ll save it for another story down the road.
We made progress but now are going to be stuck for a little bit again. There’s a whole bunch of stuff we can just ditch at this point. While I love the idea of Lord Elvin and his Faery Court inhabiting Rose’s teddy bears and dolls, I’m not sure we’re going to be able to use them beyond that concept. We had been planning on having Lord Elvin take Raven to the Dark Kingdom but since he’s revealed he knows where it is, that’s not necessary anymore and would get rid of 4-5 pages. If we’re not going to use them there’s no sense in keeping them. We’ve got these pages where Eros is acting strangely, one could overlook it considering he’s deep in the throes of grief but, well, in this version he’s supposed to turn into Apollo. I don’t think we’ll keep that either. I think we’ll keep some of him acting oddly but he won’t turn out to be Apollo in disguise when the time comes. Alena will have to swallow her pride and call for him.
That should be interesting.
So, lots of changes and rearranges. But we’ve got lots of time too so that’s good.
A disturbing thing happened yesterday and it’s thanks to the stupid Google Ad I took out. I was checking my stats and saw a hit in from a site that I knew I’d picked to host an ad scribd.com I admit, I didn’t know what it was when I picked it but it looks like ‘scribed’ to me so I thought it had something to do with writing. I clicked the link and discover that “The Heart of War” was available on this ‘library site’ for FREE and I had not put it there! I was pissed!!!!!!! I wrote them a nasty note with all of my info; copyright, ISBNs, web site, blah blah blah. Unlike Literotica…this place took it down within 4 hours! BUT, I finally realized why people are still searching things like ‘heart of war chapter 25’. The free file was ancient and it was incomplete. It had a page count that was much lower than what it should have been. AND it was in blue font. I always used blue font when I published stories on my site that includes the original rough draft of “The Heart of War”…nice navy blue font. Someone got pissed when they missed their chance to read the whole rough draft free and in order to get back at me they put it up for free. After they STOLE it off my site!
I searched for the other books but didn’t find them there. Thankfully.
I suppose I’ll spend some time checking out pirate sites to see if I pop up anywhere else.
Now I have to drag my tired…and bruised…butt to work. I have a bruise of unknown origin on my bum. One on my arm and one on my thigh. Guess I’m getting clumsy in my old age.
More writing this afternoon and tonight, hubby’s going out again so we’ll sit here and plod along. It was really rather nice last night, the house was quiet and dark, it was just me and The Big Guy wandering down the road. This afternoon’s goal is produce at least a trickle of tears and finish off the 3-in-1 death scene.
Should be fun.