This n That
Well, I told you I’d let you know how I made ‘out’. Yesterday was the day. Finally. After about a week and half and that food poisoning/stomach thing that we had last week.
It didn’t ‘go’ well.
No joke. Two hours.
I’m probably the only person you know who has to schedule time to use the bathroom to begin with but, even for me, two hours is a personal record. Long before it was over I was whimpering and bargaining with God. Yes, yes, I was. I was telling myself this better be better than ‘Randy Marsh’ and that POS ‘Bono’! (South Park). Rebecca actually braved the scene to sit with me for a minute and comfort me. She’s so sweet. Love that kid. Shortly after she left my time on the throne came to an end.
Yep, topped ‘Randy Marsh’. It was about the size of a good-sized premmie baby. No joke. I have no idea how something that big and round even gets formed in my digestive track let alone how Fate expects me to expel it when the time comes! I grunted, groaned and strained so hard and so long every muscle in my body shook afterwards and I felt cold to the bone. No fun. I had two huge mugs of cinnamon tea to help warm me up and calm my stomach. That was good. It’s much easier to bend over now! It used to hurt and make me feel sick but not now. My jeans aren’t quite as tight anymore either. Hopefully, now that the ‘bear plug’ has been removed things will flow a little easier. I took a few big swallows of Mineral Oil to help ensure that idea. Let’s hope it works.
Almost time to go into work. That package arrived yesterday so today I’m going to take them. Wanna see?
It’s nearly elegant in its simplicity. I like it. I think my boss will too. Now he’ll be able to stop using a Styrofoam cup for his coffee.
And I got one for myself. Of course I did. I figured it’d be good to have something warm to warp my hands around when the ‘water level’ was getting high at work.
Yep. Guaranteed to bring at least a small grin no matter what.🙂