Halloween Will Go On

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I’ve been trying to make this blog post for DAYS but I kept getting interrupted! At first, I thought this was a Sign from the Gods that I was being overly bitchy then the above image crossed my eyes and I remembered that I don’t care if other overly PC people think I’m bitchy.🙂

I was also reminded that I’m probably right so here goes.

I finally put up my Halloween decorations…even bought a few new ones. But that almost didn’t happen and anyone out there who knows me knows how much I LOVE and look forward to Halloween. It is my favorite holiday of the year yet it wasn’t until last weekend that I bought candy. I usually have a hefty supply of it weeks before the holiday and I’m usually the first one on my street to put out the decorations. This year was different. This year is the year that Halloween that Almost Wasn’t.

It may sound petty but I don’t care. I almost didn’t have Halloween this year due to the overwhelming plethora of parents who want their kids treated ‘special’ on this night. Let me explain.

I’ve been told and told and told about several different colored pumpkins I’m supposed to put out on Halloween night “for the kids” (that’s always the Rallying Cry of the Wimpy, isn’t it?)

Yeah, the kids that can’t have gluten, the kids that can’t have nuts, the kids that are forced to be vegan/vegetarian and the list just goes on. And on. And on. In fact, last week, my local radio station went through an entire LIST of different colored pumpkins and their meanings leaving me to wonder; Whatever happened to the good old orange Jack-O-Lantern? I guess it’s passe or something. That along with the overwhelming whiny plethora of self-absorbed parents posting on the Internet under the guise of ‘articles’ and ‘journalism’ had me tearing my gray hair out of my head. (Since my hair is back to hanging down to my butt…that’s painful!)

Any-hoo, if I were the type of sad sack who was overly PC and wimpy, leading me to along with this PC BS I’d have about half a dozen different colored pumpkins along with half a dozen bowls of different treats and I’d have to ask each costumed child who came to my door; “Do you have some type of malady I should know about? I don’t want you to choose from the wrong bowl.” I was even considering, not just canceling my own Halloween, but wondering should I pass out candy tomorrow night, if I needed some type of Waiver now. Something along the lines of; “I ________ (fill in your name) do hereby agree to take candy from Lisa Beth Darling-Gorman on October 31, 2015 a/k/a “Halloween” with full knowledge that it may contain peanuts, dairy products, additives and that it may not be gluten-free or coincide with a vegan/vegetarian diet. I _____ hereby agree to Hold Harmless Lisa Beth Darling-Gorman on behalf of myself and my child(ren) _________ should any negative dietary/allergy incidents occur due to I/my child(ren) receiving free candy from Lisa Beth Darling-Gorman.”

I might still do that just to be a royal PITA to the PC Brigade.

Look, instead of me having to buy and decorate half a dozen pumpkins in the coded color of PC Land I think it would be easier for you, the parent, to take responsibility. If your kid has a nut allergy you should dress them in a brown costume. If your kid is forced into a vegan/vegetarian lifestyle they should have to wear green. If they’re lactose intolerant they should wear white. If they can’t have gluten they should wear purple. That way, if I’ve allowed society to browbeat me and suck all the fun out of this joyous holiday, I know which bowl your kid should get something out of. I shouldn’t have to guess or to ask. No! I will not stop passing out candy on Halloween! If YOU want to relegate the holiday to stickers and glow sticks that’s YOUR prerogative. I do not have to agree or go along. If you want to be like the Jesus Freaks who pass out little pamphlets on this holiday instead of candy that’s up to you. But, be forewarned, you will be laughed at behind your back. You might even have your house/car egged or toilet papered. Yes, I will be one of the vandals. I certainly will.

This situation became so intolerable for me over this last that I actually called my daughter who lives in Michigan to ask; Was I a lousy parent because I “made” you go trick-or-treating and didn’t insist that people treat you ‘special’ because you’re diabetic?

There was a pause on the line while Nikki tried to decide if I’d lost my marbles or not then she finally said; Noooo…why?

I told her about all of the different colored pumpkins and how I appear to be being forced into going along with these things so other people’s kids don’t feel ‘left out’ or ‘different’ but mainly so they feel ‘special’…or something like that.

Her answer was a flat out; No.

We had a long conversation after which, I felt a little better about myself and my own parenting skills. I love Nikki with all of my heart, I never want anything bad to happen to her but I also didn’t want to her to feel ‘different’ or, Gods help me, ‘special’ because she’s diabetic. Her father and I determined from the moment she was diagnosed that those things would not happen. We would take responsibility for her medical condition and teach her to do the same. We, and she, would not expect the entire world to kowtow to her or us just because she’s diabetic. BTW, that condition is *at least* as “serious” as having a nut allergy. With a nut allergy, if one accidentally ingests nuts one has an EpiPen in their pocket/purse (or is supposed to have it) so they can inject themselves on-the-spot and counteract the effects of the allergy. If one is diabetic and eats too much sugar….not really the same thing at all. Nope, it isn’t. There’s no magic counter-agent for that or the long-term damage it can cause to vital internal organs.

Her first Halloween after being diagnosed was a harrowing experience. I was on pins and needles wondering if she was ok, if she felt out-of-place, and if I’d done the right thing at all. Please note, I never ever under any circumstances whatsoever expected the General Public to be responsible here. It was OUR responsibility and no one else’s. Also please note, out of the long list my local radio station gave me there wasn’t a single colored pumpkin to represent that a house was giving out SUGAR FREE candy. Not one. So I guess diabetics aren’t ‘special’ and it’s ok if they feel ‘different’ on Halloween according to the PC Brigade even though diabetics are the ONLY ONES who qualify for anything under the Americans With Disability Act. Yeah…choke that one down you nut freak. Yes, I know The Teal (ugly color if there ever was one!) Pumpkin Project is SUPPOSED TO cover diabetic kids but it’s been misappropriated by the minuscule number of nut allergic kids (yeah, no, sorry, parents of nut allergic kids) which represent less than 2% of the entire US population.

But, Nicole was excited that first Halloween after being diagnosed! Just as ALL kids are on Halloween. She didn’t want to be ‘left out’ or to feel ‘different’ on that most sacred night. She dressed up in her costume and practically RAN out the door ahead of her father and her sister. That’s when I realized that, for her and probably for most kids including myself at that age, Halloween wasn’t about EATING candy it was about GETTING candy. It was about dressing up and going house to house and just…having FUN. That’s something people like the bratty bitch who put out the above offending poster totally forgot in her haste to ‘protect’ her son from the evils of the world. You can’t do that anyway, not even with a so-called “normal” kid. You can’t protect them forever nor should you, as a responsible parent, even try. As a responsible parent your job is to raise a responsible ADULT. Suck that one down with a bag of Sour Patch Kids.

Nikki came home that night with a PILLOW CASE FULL of CANDY. Just as she did the year before and in the years after her diagnosis. Just as her sister “the normal kid” did for years. We went through it piece by piece, just as we did in previous years and in subsequent years, looking for any defects or signs it had been tampered with. To this day, THAT is my biggest concern. Some utter freak tampered with the candy. They injected it with something, laced it with something, put razor blades or ground glass in it. Yes, those assholes exist. Yes, they do that. Yes, THAT is more dangerous than a peanut any day because those freaks can do it to ANY candy or…any sticker your child may have to lick. (LSD anyone?) So we went through it piece by piece. Those bits of candy deemed ‘safe’ by me, Mom, a responsible parent, were given to her and she was told; “Select the ones you REALLY want”. She did. She left the rest….more than half the pillow case full because some people pass out some truly crappy candy. What she didn’t want, if her sister or us, her parents, didn’t want it, it got tossed. From the portion she wanted she was allowed to select ‘X’ number of pieces to eat right away. The rest we doled out a little at a time to her. Some of it we even bought from her and the money was hers to do with as she saw fit.

THAT is “responsible parenting”. Expecting the entire world to bend over backward for your “special” kid is NOT.

Some people will tell you that “It Takes a Village to Raise a Child” but that’s not true. All it takes to raise a responsible adult is ONE adult who is kind, compassionate, who looks out for that child and teaches them to STAND on their own TWO FEET, whether they’re related to said child or not makes no difference. (I, the adult adoptee, should know.)

If YOU WANT to have several different bowls of candy/stickers/glow sticks/tooth brushes/Jesus pamphlets for kids to choose from this Halloween that’s up to YOU. Go for it. To the parents of “special” kids…it is YOUR freakin’ JOB to ensure those kids have a happy and safe Halloween. You. And YOU alone. No one else.

Got it?

If not, you are not only an “irresponsible parent” YOU are raising an ADULT who will EXPECT the entire world to bow down to their ‘special needs’ and who will NEVER be responsible for THEMSELVES. That we don’t need. We have more than enough self-entitled, ignorant, arrogant. ME-FIRST/ME ONLY people in this world. Kindly don’t add to them. The world doesn’t need them. Or YOU. Keep that in mind before you walk out your door tomorrow night. If YOU can’t handle that, if you were raised in a world where you got an ‘award’ for simply showing up and not having anything else expected of you….tough titty said the kitty. Stay HOME and teach your “special” kid that Halloween is the Devil’s Night! It’s for SATAN and people who don’t believe in the Big JC. It’ll be BS, of course, but at least it will relieve YOU of any responsibility that you just can’t handle because…you’re a wimp and a self-entitled little snot who is raising the same.

To everyone out there…..


****OCTOBER 31, 2015 UPDATE****

I never expected so many people to come rushing in here…1200+ hits in less than 3 days!… or to have this post shared so much….almost 300 times on Facebook! That’s “nuts”. If you’re interested, this topic continues in the next post Halloween Will Go On Part Deux. I suspect this topic of conversation will wrap up on November 1, 2015 with a third and final installment undoubtedly to be entitled Halloween Will Go On Part Trois. If you’re really interested in ME then, ya know, you could always buy one of my books or something. No, just kidding, no I’m not. Shameless plug. Sorry.


About lbdarling

Beware...the truth is spoken here. If you can't handle that...buh-bye.

Posted on 30/10/2015, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. I think that you are absolutely right! I was not a “special” child, but I loved to dress in costume and run door to door! Sometimes I got candy, sometimes an apple, I even got boxes of raisins, wrapped muffins…in other words, many things! It wasn’t about candy, it was about dressing up, hanging with friends and having fun! Don’t let anyone ruin this awesome holiday for you. Happy Halloween to you my friend!!!

    • Oh wow..yeah…we got homemade popcorn balls (my fave!), homemade candy/caramel apples (another fave!), sometimes homemade brownies or cupcakes. I loved it but in this day and age you’d have to toss those wonderful treats afraid some whack job tainted them. I always looked forward to dressing up and running around more than I did eating the goodies I was able to garner. Happy Halloween, Sister! I hope you have a wonderfully magickal night!

  2. Well said, Lisa. Helicopter parents are not only out of control but are creating a generation of kids who can barely survive in the big wide world beyond their parents’ homes. Responsible parents raise responsible kids.

  3. most parents are pc lazy control jerk twatwaffles who are reason most kids are fucking selfish stupid ticturds with me me fuck you tude. you n Roy done good. parents dont want their idiot drones to have the “killer” food dont let them out or search the loot. I wont make changes just to suit strangers and their self importance applause

    • Whatever happened to actually taking up the responsibility of being a parent? It’s just so totally weird. I’m glad we grew up when we did. I almost feel like we’re witnessing the downfall of society or something.😦

  1. Pingback: LMFOA | Lisa Beth Darling

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